11 reasons why someone should hire Maria Menounos right now

Maria Menounos got into it with Mario Lopez—now she’s out of luck and out of a job. So here’s her resume, here’s why somebody should hire her right now.

11. She’s a dude with boobs

10. She, um, shakes well

9. Like, really well

8.Men are like putty in her hands

7.She’s not afraid to show a little skin

6. Because this gets TV ratings

5. She throws a mean punch

4. Because bouncing

3. Because dammit, she’s adorable

2. And wait, what? Have mercy!

1. And really if you don’t hire her, she’ll rub your face in it forever—and by face, I mean butt