Getty Image
Disgraced former Subway pitchman slash convicted pedophile Jared Fogle made news again this past week as he made a ridiculous attempt to have his conviction overturned so he could be released from prison.
Fogle, who previously appealed his 15-year prison sentence back in June of 2016 and was told to “f**k off” by the judge (I am paraphrasing…kind of), this time had jailhouse lawyer and fellow inmate Frank Pate file his motion for him.
That motion? Oh, it stated that the court doesn’t have jurisdiction over Fogle because he is a “sovereign citizen.”
[protected-iframe id=”6eaa788bc306b3d9755b98e05e19fa11-97886205-92827192″ info=”https://giphy.com/embed/Lq3ueCSWjnQPu” width=”640″ height=”274″ frameborder=”0″ class=”giphy-embed” allowfullscreen=””]
According to USLegal.com…
Sovereign citizens believe that U.S. citizens are either “Fourteenth Amendment citizens” (who are subject to the federal and state laws and taxes) or “sovereign citizens”, who are subject only to common law or “constitutional law” (or both), but are not bound to obey statutory law. No court has ever upheld these claims.
[protected-iframe id=”74d57bb75875842c3c388470da8e8bd1-97886205-92827192″ info=”https://giphy.com/embed/65os7odbIW6pa” width=”640″ height=”394″ frameborder=”0″ class=”giphy-embed” allowfullscreen=””]
Amazingly, U.S. District Judge Tanya Pratt decided in a two-page ruling that, nope, Fogle is still going to stay in prison, reports Courthousenews.com…
“If Fogle is now claiming to be ‘sovereign,’ the Seventh Circuit has rejected theories of individual sovereignty, immunity from prosecution, and their ilk,” Pratt wrote. “Regardless of his theory, Fogle’s challenge of this court’s jurisdiction is rejected.”
On the bright side, at least Jared apparently is comfortable enough in prison now that he’s stopped writing creepy letters, suing the parents of his victims, and getting his ass beaten for being a child molester.
Smell you in 2030, inmate number 12919-028. If you last that long.
H/T Death and Taxes