The Time Calvin Harris Almost Got Hit By A Flying Dwarf At A Crazy Miley Cyrus Party

Celebrity parties are not like your parties. They have the world’s best DJs both on the tables and in attendance. They’ve often got outrageous gift bags and gimmicks. Celebrities have endless resources and wealth, and this leads to some outlandish hootnannies.

Case in point, a Miley Cyrus party that almost ended with world famous DJ and Taylor Swift ex-boyfriend Calvin Harris getting taken out by a flying midget. Somehow, the least shocking part of this story is the fact that Miley Cyrus hires flying dwarves to perform at her rooftop parties. But I digress….

Liam Payne, a singer/songwriter from the UK and former member of the boy band One Direction, recently told a story about how he saved Calvin Harris from getting #wrekt by a flying midget at Miley Cyrus’ 21st birthday party:

Liam told told The Sun: ‘I was at Miley Cyrus’ 21st birthday party. There was obviously everybody there and I saved Calvin Harris from a midget. That was quite bizarre.
‘They had flying midgets at this thing. It was a rooftop thing. One was coming behind him and it was like a slow-mo of me shouting at Calvin to duck. He’s a tall boy and there was a midget coming at his head and literally that would have been curtains for him.’
After the incident Calvin his thanks to the 1Der for his lightening reactions: ‘Big thank you to Real_Liam_Payne for saving me from getting KO’d by a flying ‘person of unusually short stature’ tonight.’
The event reportedly took place at Beacher’s Madhouse in LA three years ago. (via Metro UK)

I fucking LOVE this story and I’ll tell you why. Liam Payne is a big deal over in the UK even if you’ve never heard his name before today. This story of the insanely raucous rooftop party in LA with flying midgets is making its way all around Great Britain right now. Londoners are reading Liam’s tale thinking that parties involving flying dwarves are commonplace in Los Angeles, that this is how we party in America. And that’s a reputation I’m totally on board with keeping intact.

Just a heads up, you don’t have to be a celebrity to party with dwarves. Two years ago I went to the Dos Equis Masquerade Ball and they had an entire room of performing midgets, which I somehow missed and was told about later. The party was in a huge/old bank building down on Wall Street with countless rooms, and it was impossible to see everything. I found out there was a room full of performing midgets after we left the party and my buddy told me, to which I blurted out VERY LOUDLY ‘there was an entire fucking room of midgets and you didn’t tell me?!?’…Then I hear ‘yeah, that was us’. I look behind me and see a dwarf couple, a man and woman, and to this day I still lose sleep over how awkward and uncomfortable that moment was.

Flying midgets though, I kind of hope it was a situation like this where they were all painting vaginas. It would make it that much more Hollywood:

[h/t Metro UK]

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Cass Anderson is the Editor-in-Chief of BroBible. Based out of Florida, he covers an array of topics including NFL, Pop Culture, Fishing News, and the Outdoors.