We can all agree that Dawn of the Planet of the Apes was a really good fuckin’ movie. It had action, violence, romance, monkeys, Gary Oldman, basically anything you could ever want in a summertime movie that Michael Bay had nothing to do with whatsoever.
Except…where the hell were the monkey dicks???
NOWHERE, THAT’S WHERE. Not a single ape/monkey/whateverIdon’tcare had any junk. How did they reproduce? Or even go to the monkey bathroom for that matter? I find it hard to believe that I enjoyed a movie about a bunch of constipated monkeys as much as I did.
My life is a lie.