Lil Dicky Talks About Being Clueless About Politics And How Sex Gets Thrown At His Feet Now That He’s Famous

Lil Dicky cares a lot more about you getting an STD than he does about the future of America. His desire to keep your dick unspotted may have something to do with him recently becoming the spokesman for Trojan condoms, which begs the question: does Dicky really care about your dicky? Regardless, I can resonate with his political blissful ignorance, considering I watched 8,273 different angles of the Villanova national championship game winner and I couldn’t tell one of Hillary’s political aspirations. I also watched this video of a baby goat having an orgasm way more times that is socially acceptable. Thanks for footing the bill for my college education, dad.

Dicky does make a hell of a case for putting on a cock sock, though.


Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.