Quit Playing With Your Dinghy And Start Playing ‘Porn: The Game’

By 04.07.16

porn the game video ad commercial

It’s kind of hard to believe it’s taken this long into the A.D. for someone to create a card game about pornography. You’d think with the success of Cards Against Humanity, the next logical step would be to piggyback on that depravity and churn out a truly unruly contest that absolutely has to lead to sex. Now, we’ve finally got it with Porn: The Game. Here’s the SFW commercial, which was published back in October 2015…

The game makers describe Porn as…

“…an homage to the history and beauty of vintage smut, an era, before the interenet, where seedy shops and dirty theaters were where the pervs got their kicks; VHS tapes, glory holes, donkey shows, and orgies; when bushes were as beautiful as mustaches sexy!”

So, how you do play? This video should sexily explian (sexplain?)…

So, three or more players start with four cards while the rest are set aside to draw from. Take turns playing a card and follow the rules accordingly. First player to unload all their cards wins. More and more this sounds like a game that Charlie Sheen would play before the whole… well, you know.

If you’re still horny for more – because who isn’t after gang-bang? – then you can get the Extreme Drunkard Expansion pack, an add-on that goes from Skinemax to Extreme Hardcore through 18 unique cards with mini-games and challenges. As the official site states, “If PORN:THE GAME is Foreplay, this is the Orgasm.” Gadoosh!

You have to love the slogan: “ENLARGE YOUR DECK TODAY.” Plus, the price ain’t bad either, just $20 to contract every STD under the sun, son.

Good news for all you Spanish-speaking spankers and crank-yankers, the game is also available en Espanol.

Via Reddit


TAGScard gamesPornporn the game

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