Rob Lowe Is Looking For A New Personal Assistant And He’s Got Some Weird Ass Qualifications

52-year-old actor Rob Lowe is a busy man. He’s currently filming/starring in two TV series (The Lion Guard and Code Black), he’s appearing in Super Troopers 2 which is now in post-production. Rob’s also appearing in some film titled How To Be A Latin Lover, which without knowing anything about the film I somehow think he’s probably both perfect and awful for whatever part it is he’s playing.

Rob Lowe‘s been one of Hollywood’s busiest actors since he first hit the screen back in 1979. He doesn’t have time for typical household chores like you or me, he needs a personal assistant to do things like fire up the jacuzzi, make sure dinner’s handled at his ‘estate’, and carry around shit up to (but not exceeding 25lbs).

TMZ discovered a recent job listing posted by Rob Lowe seeking a new personal assistant, and it shows a pretty weird ass list of qualifications if you ask me. Note that in this listing ‘THE CLIENT’ is referring to Rob Lowe:

— Never assume anything

— Ensure the CLIENT [Rob] is fed and has coffee throughout the day

— Schedule haircuts every episode for the CLIENT

— Ensure that the CLIENT HAS A DINNER PLAN IF ARRIVING HOME LATER THAN 8 PM in the evening

— Make sure you let Estate staff know if the CLIENT wants a Jacuzzi turned on or a massage ordered for his arrival

— Willing to travel on location as requested and serve as the CLIENT’S body man

— Able to lift up to 25 pounds as required to support THE CLIENT

The job pays $70,000/year by the way.

‘Never assume anything’?!?! What in the actual fuck does that mean in the context of a job listing? My mind immediately wanders to the thought that Rob Lowe does some really, REALLY unexplainable shit behind doors but then again it says to ‘never assume anything’, so I can’t really jump to conclusions here, can I?

Lastly: what human being isn’t capable of lifting 25-pounds? Aside from persons with medical issues, is there a single adult on the planet that can’t lift 25 pounds? No. The answer is no because every adult alive can lift this tiny amount of weight. There’s absolutely no reason to include something this menial in a job description, is there? Or am I assuming too much again?

[h/t TMZ]

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Cass Anderson is the Editor-in-Chief of BroBible. Based out of Florida, he covers an array of topics including NFL, Pop Culture, Fishing News, and the Outdoors.