Whether you want to buy a few more shirts or a trip around the world, you can do it on the Internet. Want a 2 million dollar personal submarine? You can find it with a Google search. For those of us that don’t have $2 million in our pockets, here’s a list of 50 gadgets and pieces of gear that Bros can pick up for under fifty bucks. Nearly all of these are available on Amazon.
$39.95 – Perfect for tailgates, day-longs, or a regular Tuesday. The pockets are insulated, and this thing is f*ckin’ fantastic.
2. Flying F*ck
$29.99 – Entertain yourself and some friends for a while whether you give one or not.
$29.75 – Having the ability to back a punch with 950,000 volts of electricity seems like the closest to a super power I’ll ever get.
$15.25 – If you have the brass knuckles taser, you don’t need a blade. So instead swap it for a switch-opener.
$44.99 – Being able to avoid the po-po is a key trait for a bro. These help.
$19.20 – Guns and alcohol should never be mixed, but this seems like the safest option.
$15.98 – Whether you want to play the game or not, it comes with 16 shot glasses which is a fantastic deal in itself.
$39.99 – Everybody needs speakers, so why not just get a bigger version of your head phones? It makes sense.
10. Toilet Mini Golf
$15.95 – Sh*tting and golf are two things that most men enjoy. When combined, you’ll be off to a great day.
$3.70 – At only 2 ounces of volume, where this guy lacks in size it makes up for in price and convenience.
$9.88 – Start your morning off with a bang.
$9.69 – No matter how hard you wish it won’t turn into a real joint.
$29.99 – If you find yourself on a deserted island, this will help. So will a camera crew, rescue helicopters and contracts.
$29 – These are not currently unavailable on Amazon, and I think Dwight Schrute must have snagged the last one. Here’s why.
$39.95 – Combine this with the 12-Can Ammo Pack for a very successful tailgate.
$29.99 – I’m not going to support any bro that wears this, but the concept is cool. Buy it for your girl or someone else.
$8.95 – Now we can teach children art without turning them into hipsters. Revolutionary.
22. Home Brewing Kit
$44.49 – I’m sure it would take me a few tries to make anything that’s not horrific, but the reward of my own brew would be worth it in the end.
$39 – If it wasn’t for the effort I’d have to put in, I could totally go for homemade beers and snow cones.
24. Pocket Chainsaw
$13.24 – Make sure to have your taser knuckles on if you ever meet a guy carrying this.
25. Ice Luge
$21.89 – Easy to prepare, easy to get f*cked up.
We’re just getting started. Check out 25 more on the next page.
$13.30 – Scratch your balls in style.
$21.95 – Like the roulette set, the 26 shot glasses this comes with may be worth a buy in themselves.
$2.85 – The bracelet can be transformed into nine feet of rope. From there, hope you have those helicopters like Bear Grylls.
29. 2-Liter Das Boot
$29.50 – DAS BOOT!
$20.99 – DAS BOOTS!
31. Beer Holster
$24.85 – It’s not quite as effective as numbers 1 or 100, but it’s a solid option.
$12 – I am heavily against people dressing up their dogs. I think it’s ridiculous. However, if you’re going to, this one’s kind of funny.
$36.99 – Always be welcoming to your guests.
$14.99 – A slightly less effective version of, “I’m CEO, Bitch.”
36. Whiskey Stones
$19.99 – Bros don’t need their drinks watered down, use these instead of ice.
$17.99 – These will make your table look good, but if you have old, real vinyls, those would be the way to go.
$15.99 – The survival tools just keep coming. Plus, this one has a bottle opener.
$15.15 – Nothing flashy, but I’d love to enjoy a cold one out of one of these.
$35.60 – Making this and not buying it could save some cash, but f*ck it I’m lazy.
42. B**b Koozies
$8.96 – Beer and fake b**bs go together like PB&J.
$21.25 – Bros can never have enough places to hide sh*t.
44. Freedom Flask
$24.95 – 32 ounces of booze, easy to conceal and wear. Beautiful.
45. Portable Shower
$29.90 – 10 liters of clean water for a shower at any time and anywhere.
$11.76 – Make your bottle of wine look as bad*ss as possible.
47. Hand Blades
$34.68 – Tempting, but I’d still go with the brass knuckle taser.
$42.12 – A necessity at any party, tailgate, or place where getting f*cked up happens.
$25.99 – Give me one good reason why not.
$39.95 – Your whiiskey stone collection is now twice as good.
$24.99 – Seat goes up nice and easy. Seat goes back down. Everybody wins.
$27.50 – The trick is taking a sip of the beer without losing all that food. I’m skeptical.
55. Razor Sharpener
$24.46 – Because razor blades are f*ckin expensive.
57. Snowball Blaster
$29.99 – Childish? Yes. However going on a rampage with one of these bad boys would definitely not be a bad thing.
58. Beer Belly
$29.95 – The negative is that you indeed have a beer belly, but the positive is that you can hold a f*ck ton of booze.
$17.99 – Kill two birds with one stone, but if you lose it you’re f*cked.
60. Mini Pool Table
$28.95 – Like the mini air hockey table, this just makes any regular table that much better.
$28.49 – A conversation starter that’s up there with the best of them. Let a chick see this on the beach then take her back for more later.
$20.99 – I wouldn’t bring this to the beach, but it looks pretty damn comfortable.
63. Flip-Up Keyboard
$19.95 – There’s definitely some use in this. Mainly let a little more time pass before I lose sh*t.
65. Plug Mug
$18.99 – This would absolutely be effective, and you can even keep the plug in your flip-up keyboard.
68. Axe Multi-Tool
$30.44 – There are zero bad things about this tool. Ron Swanson probably has about eight of them.
69. Condoms in Bulk
$18.20 – 100 condoms for under 20 bucks is a pretty sweet deal if you’re going to buy condoms.
70. Skull Pitcher
$17.24 – Whether it’s a skull or not, pitchers are always good to have. Looking cool can’t hurt.
$24.75 – “It’s the one that says ‘Bad mother f*cker.”
$10.99 – This one is probably not worth the $10.99 to wipe your a** with, but where I can see it being useful is in TPing some d*ckhead’s house.
$34.99 – What I’m getting from this is that you can add or remove sections of the tank, but would it be wrong to let the fighting fish just battle it out?
$8.75 – If these gloves do a good job keeping your hands warm, then they’re a great buy for under 10 bucks.
$34.95 – “60% of the time it works, every time.”
77. Haircut Umbrella
$8.99 – This looks absolutely absurd, but I know a lot of bros that cut their own, or their bros’, hair. This makes for an easy clean-up.
$9.89 – Hungover, lazy, and have no drinks? Bam. Plus you save a cup.
79. LED Faucet
$38.99 – Who knew there were so many ways to pimp out a faucet?
$21.30 – It says it’s for your dog, but this looks like a tennis ball sling shot to me
81. Can Beer Bong
$3.95 – 3 seconds to chug a can? Sign me up.
$24 – This would be a lot cooler if the grass didn’t just hide the wires but somehow charged your phone without them.
83. Shot Darts
$12.86 – A solid drinking game option until players start missing the board all together.
84. Spin the Shot
$11.24 – Easy enough to understand: arrow points to you, get f*cked up.
85. Shot Tender
$39.99 – Looks good, and nobody will knock over bottles at your party. Win, win.
86. Meter Coffee Mug
$9.60 – If Coors Light can make money with their blue mountains, whoever makes this should be on pace for millions.
$6.72 – Cleaning made easier when pledges aren’t an option.
$9.94 – If you live in a place where beer pong will be played, this deal is a no brainer. 144 ping pong balls is a lot, but 10 bucks is not too bad.
The combination of camo and beer holders alone makes this a grilling gem that unfortunately can’t be found on Amazon right now.
92. Dog Water Pedal
$35.56 – Dogs that can do things on their own or for me are cool. I feel like this can be a start.
$21.95 – I’m thinking these chop sticks will do the work for me if they’re that expensive.
94. Drinking Helmet
$8.99 – If you want to be that guy that wears this, here’s your chance.
$21.18 – Only one person drinks, but nobody knows who it’s going to be. There would definitely be some hilarious outcomes with this.
$26.34 – Keep those brews cold, simple as that.
$29.99 – Keys and lighters would definitely not be lost (as much) with these, and if it can really hold a hammer that’s pretty impressive.
100. Can Holster Belt
$6.99 – Combine with the 12-Can Ammo Pack and the Dual Drink Backpack and then you’re fully loaded for an awesome tailgate (or just any day).
Everything is there for the taking on the Internet. This list has some things that, while incredibly random, hopefully made you think, “Sh*t that’s pretty sweet.”
[H/T] to This Is Why I’m Broke for a lot of the items and inspiration.
I want more like this!
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