Fat people float, or so I’ve been told. So this story of Louie Anderson sinking to the bottom of the pool seems anti-science. According to TMZ (the internet’s home of reliable celebrity diving information), Ndamukong Suh saved the comedian following a mishap in the water for Splash—a celebrity diving show.
Sources close to the production tell TMZ, Louie — who’s a contestant on the show — was practicing his dives on Wednesday when he became a little too bushed to pull himself up the ladder … falling back into the water again and again.
We’re told Louie eventually had to be rescued by Suh and divemaster Greg Louganis — who physically lifted the foundering funnyman to the poolside. Louie then sat coughing up water for several seconds.
WE NEED A GIF STAT!
Louie Anderson climbs up ladder, falls, climbs, falls, climbs, falls. That’s internet gold folks.
Of course, none of this information’s true because:
a) Ndamukong Suh was too busy clubbing baby seals
b) Nobody was screaming “Free Willy” as Louie Anderson desperately reached land
So my apologies people, this appears to be some PR bullshit.