Finally, penis warmers have arrived on Etsy!
The hot new trend? Hand-made wool penis warmers. And here I’ve been, sitting with my genitals both frigid and undecorated for years like a savage.
The UK’s Metro tells the story of Radmila Kus, a Croatian woman allegedly making a “fortune” off the sales of “penis warmers,” oft-colorful wool sweaters for your junk.
“I used to make slippers for tourists but these willy warmers are so popular I just can’t keep up,” she told the paper.
According to Kus, the odd accessory originated in the mountain areas of Croatia. Local women in the region would make the dong clothing to keep their husbands warm in the horrific cold to keep them fertile and increase their chances of having kids.
Kus takes personalized orders (with measurements!) on her Etsy page.
So if your penis is cold and you also have the yearning to make your genitals look vaguely like one of the characters in Maurice Sendak’s classic Where the Wild Things Are, get to ordering.
Etsy Now Offering Penis Warmers [The Gloss]