Why are some guys always getting laid while others are missing opportunities left and right? Quality outweighs quantity for sure, but no guy wants to be missing out on both, if he can help it. Let's take a look at some reasons you're not getting laid on the regular.
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If you're not an interesting guy, then you’re not going to go very far with any woman who isn’t dead behind her eyes. That is, unless you’re extremely handsome, naturally talented and appropriately aloof. Do you know what girls want to hear about? It isn’t the things you think will impress them, but rather things that you love, believe in, and are passionate about; as well as good stories, your friends and family, interesting facts and your life goals. Not only that, but you should have questions to ask her. Remember, interesting people are also interested.
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Confidence problems will cause this to happen, guaranteed. You can fake it til’ you make it, but just make sure you’re being “respectfully aggressive,” by not making her feel uncomfortable or forcing anything. Part of being aggressive has to do with timing; if too much time goes by without you making moves, she will be frustrated and disappointed. It sucked back in school when your teacher wasn’t even angry, just “disappointed in you” and it’ll suck even worse if it’s a desirable woman that you’ve let down.
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Just as a lack of focus and action can have its drawbacks, so too does too much. If you’re too aggressive, you’re going to communicate a few unattractive things:
1) You really neeeeeeed to get laid. (She does not want to have sex with someone who is relying on it.)
2) You may be the type that uses women for sex and not much else. (No woman is into that).
3) You see her as a slut. (Even sluts don’t want to be thought of as a slut. Unless they’re a reaaaaaaaal slut.)
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A “whatever happens, happens” kind of attitude will tend to be your best bet when it comes to dating and sex. Women tend to appreciate that as opposed to say, a quantified sexual timetable that you’ve drawn up so she can see just when you plan on committing penetration.
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For most women (outside of L.A.) you don’t need to have a kick-ass wardrobe, baller set of wheels, expensive haircut or cavern-sized apartment, but you will need to make sure that both you and your belongings are passably clean, pleasant smelling and presentable. Before a date - and especially a date where you think you’ll be getting laid - go ahead and spend a little extra time picking out your outfit and being hygienic.
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Don’t become her go-to to get things done. If you do what she asks all the time, e.g. buying her things, taking her out, driving her places, fixing things for her, etc., then there’s no way she’ll have the kind of attraction to you that encourages regular sex (if any at all). You are a friend or a partner or a love interest, not a servant. Don’t let that keep you from being a good guy; just don’t be a good guy she only calls when she needs something.
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Have you ever made out with a girl and found that inside her gaping maw there was no tongue to be found? Or, her tongue was like some fat slug that crawled all over your gums leaving a slimy trail in its wake? It sounds awful, doesn’t it? You don’t want to leave that kind of impression either. Everyone has their kissing and heavy-petting preferences, so pay attention to subtle cues. Nothing will kill the mood faster than your heavy-handed make-out performance or a honk-honk-style boob squeeze.
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Good looks do not necessarily mean she is more fun to have sex with. Good looks do not equal sexiness. You can always lower your typical (and society-driven) hip-to-bust ratio standards and be a happy, sexually active guy.
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