Circumcision Protester Will Give You A Foreskin Sculpture if You Donate $1,000 To His Campaign, Seems Excessive

Italian artist and snake oil salesman, Vincenzo Aiello, is pretty sensitive about foreskin.

He is currently launching a kickstarter campaign to protest the practice of of male circumcision through “art” (whatever that means).

All you have to do to get your VERY OWN framed silicon replica foreskin is donate $1,000 to the campaign coined “HUFO: The Missing Link”. Just $1,000.

Is this dude fucking serious? I wouldn’t pay this dude $1,000 if the alternative was him hacking my cock off with a rusty Swiss Army knife.

Oh wait, it sounds like there is a more affordable option for us foreskin lovers who may have excess skin, without the excess of cash. If you donate $50 to his campaign, you get a t-shirt with foreskin on the front. As if I already didn’t have enough trouble getting laid.

IRONY ALERT: Aiello got his hood trimmed nine years ago “for medical reasons” but would not elaborate further. Literally the last person on this planet who should be holding the torch for this movement is this phony. Dude, us babies didn’t have a choice. Am I glad my shaft isn’t snuggled in a sleeping bag? Of course. But as a grown ass man, you consciously made the decision to do exactly what you’re telling everyone not to do. I’m so incensed right now I may donate $1,000, get a piece of foreskin, and choke you out with it.

The dude has already swindled $12,000 and me shedding light on this will probably get him a more. Fuck, I gotta change the subject.

You guys hear about that kid with the hair leaving One Direction??

Ugh. Fuck me.

[H/T Huffington Post]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.