Turns Out Having Confidence In Online Dating Is A Bad Thing

by 2 years ago
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Just when you think you’ve got this dating thing all figured out, shit changes.

For the longest time, probably since like Jesus, people preached confidence was the key to attracting ladies. That’s how He got Mary Magdalene. Told her he could walk on water. That’s some cocky ass shit.

Works for all of us, though. Be confident. Strut. Pop that collar. Get laid.

Well, it turns out what’s good for the goose ain’t good for the gander. If confidence is an asset in real life, on the internet, it apparently can be detrimental to your dating prospects.

Confidence, according to a new study, is off-putting.

/recalibrates entire dating profile to come across as mopey

/still doesn’t get laid

That’s the finding of a new study by Emily Yeh, a Computer Science student at Carnegie Mellon University and a former data scientist intern at OKCupid. From The Science of Us:

[There] happens to be one very specific group that has no business being overly self-confident in online dating, as it appears to harm them rather than help: college-age guys. The more confident these young men are, the less success they see on the online dating site OKCupid,

Not surprisingly, higher self-reported self-confidence correlated with initiating more conversations, a finding that was consistent across genders and age groups. As for receiving messages from other users, having high self-confidence here helped the older group, and it helped the younger women, too. But that didn’t hold true for the younger men; on the contrary, “the more modest the male is, the more messages they receive,” Yeh said.

Interesting. So all you cocky, confident bros from the ages of 18-22 better tone it the fuck down. Flatten out that collar. Take off those shades. Look sad. Say you’re unsure of yourself.

Bathe in sweet trim.

[Via New York Magazine]


TAGSconfidenceDatingOnline datingparadoxes

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