Guys it’s snowing like a bitch outside, I’ve had a few drinks too many, and my sh*tty little hybrid douchemobile can’t possibly make it to the neighborhood Taco Bell in this weather. I need someone with a 4 wheel drive vehicle to come pick my drunk ass up, take me to the Taco Bell drive-thru, and drive me back home. Then we can hang out and play video games if you’re not a rapist. This is maybe 2 miles round trip. I’ll pay in tacos. or chalupas. whatever. Seriously my desire for tacos right now is totally unmanageable, so I’d probably even buy you a 7 layer burrito if you asked nicely.
How does this saga end? According to Reddit, he ended up taking himself. His meal? “I had a nacho loco taco, a crunchy taco, a soft taco, a chalupa, and some Cinnabon bites that tasted like straight up assholes.”
What a hero. Speaking of assholes, have fun with yours after all that Taco Bell. It always tastes good going in, but coming out is a very different story.
[H/T: Daily Dot]
“