Meet The Flatworm Who Shoots Himself In His Head With His Own Sperm To Impregnate Himself

Most of you Bros’ dicks aren’t long enough to give yourself a facial (ya done got burnt), but even if they were, it’s doubtful you’d do it.

I mean, what would be the appeal of that? And think of the mess. Such mess.

But the flatworm is not you. When it’s lonely and wants to have babies (which, why?) it splooges in its own face to impregnate itself.

The world is weird man and I haven’t even taken the acid I was planning on dropping this weekend.

From Science News:

Lonely hermaphroditic flatworms with needle-tipped male organs apparently inject themselves with sperm in whatever body region is easy to stab.

Our quest for best sentence of 2015 is over. That wins. But read on.

If raised alone in the lab, a tiny Macrostomum hystrix flatworm ends up with sperm distributed oddly around its body, researchers report July 1 in Proceedings of the Royal Society B. More sperm gets injected into the head and upper body and less into their rears than in counterparts with social opportunities, says coauthor Steven Ramm of Bielefeld University in Germany.

Flatworms are pervs.

[H/T Boing Boing]