Hold on bros, let me save you the suspense…
Guilty.
Don’t even need to hear his case. No human being in the history of human existence has been innocent with a haircut like that.
What baffles me is that the dude didn’t have an explanation of his actions (“I don’t, I can’t explain it”), but how can he muster up the words to describe to his barber what he’s going for? “Ya let me get the usual–the Lloyd Christmas in front, the Bryce Harper low fade on the sides and the Kid Rock in back.”
It was really nice of him to take a break from swimming in vagina fluids to make time for Good Morning America.
For real, though. These kids are so full of shit. I know a lie when I hear one (See: every time my dad tells me he loves me), and these kids are lying like a rug.