Bro Pretends He’s A Former NSA Agent On Tinder And Of Course Ladies Love A Spy

I have no need for Tinder in my life, unlike my boy Matt across the desk. But if there’s one thing I learned from blogging over 200 stories ABOUT Tinder in my tenure here at BroBible, it’s that the way to get laid using it is to come up with something absolutely outlandish like pretending you’re a Yeti ghost alpaca who moonlights as a NASA scientist and then go forth. The dumbest schtick is usually the schtick that gets a lady’s attention, which means everyone wins.

This dude pretended to be a former NSA agent who used to be on Tinder explicitly for spying data collection. Of course, it worked with colossal success. Kinda makes me feel bad for the NSA dudes with super secret security clearances at Ft. Meade who DESPERATELY want to get laid via Tinder but have to say something generic like “government security analyst.” You’re not kidding anyone with a vague profile like that in the D.C.-Baltimore area, Bro.

I guess being a spy is the ultimate panty dropper. Then again, I didn’t need a Reddit thread to know this. Quinn from Homeland taught me that years ago.

Brandon Wenerd is BroBible's publisher, writing on this site since 2009. He writes about sports, music, men's fashion, outdoor gear, traveling, skiing, and epic adventures. Based in Los Angeles, he also enjoys interviewing athletes and entertainers. Proud Penn State alum, former New Yorker. Email: brandon@brobible.com