Here’s footage from a surveillance video at a Chattanooga gas station that caught a robust woman trying to steal a 12-pack of beer by sticking it up her dress and, hopefully, not all up in her ‘wallet’.
This brazen crook found a creative way to steal her booze. The story coming up at 530 and 6pm @newschannelnine pic.twitter.com/ccjRCsfykN
— Brandon Evans (@brandonevansnc9) May 12, 2016
Not quite sure which beer she took. Initially, I wanted to say Bud Light… oh, my bad, “America Light”, but it could be Keystone Light. Odds are against Blue Moon, but she’s got zest and that pairs well with the artisan craft.
Here’s the quote from the convenience store owner:
“She was the original thigh master, you know? She got a 12 pack of beer and stuck it between her legs,” Winters said. “Then, she walked to the counter, made a purchase of fuel and walked back to her automobile.”
Her purchase of fuel? She took 70 cents out of the change tray at the station counter to pay for her gas. What a F U move! “Paying customers only”? Oh, I got you.
As much as I’d want to be buds with this big, beautiful beer baron, I’d worry that if we ever got into a lil’ tiff, she’d crush my skull with her monster hams in my sleep. Dana White would be wise to book this brute against Ronda Rousey and Holly Holm in a three-way main event.