Google Maps New Timeline Feature Is Perfect For Everyone Except Liars And Cheaters

Google will one day know every single move you make on every day of your life and you’re powerless to stop it. Happy Thursday.

Google Timeline will not show you everywhere you’ve ever been, so long as you’ve accepted location tracking in Google Photos or Google Now. If so, they’ve been logging your movements and the data is on Android and desktop.

Here’s why you’d ever need to know every single place you’ve ever been, according to Google.

“Your Timeline allows you to visualize your real-world routines, easily see the trips you’ve taken and get a glimpse of the places where you spend your time,” a statement from Gerard Sanz, Google Product Manager, says on the company’s website.

Google is quick to point out though that ONLY YOU can see your timeline..or anyone who looks at your phone or knows your passwords. You can also delete history and even entire days because THAT never makes anyone look guilty of anything.

“How could I have cheated on you! Look at my Google Timeline! I haven’t moved from this spot since 2013!”

[via AskMen]

Chris Illuminati avatar
Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.