Deranged GOP Lawmaker Has Some Hot Takes About Anal Sex

I imagine there isn’t much to do as a state senator in South Dakota. Appropriate funds for the maintenance of state parks and … actually, that’s really the only task I think a state senator in South Dakota has. Appropriate funds for nature preservation. Get reelected.

An idle mind is a dangerous thing, which brings us to today, and to Steve Hickey, a Republican in the upper chamber of South Dakota’s legislature. He wrote a letter to the editor of the Argus Leader, the largest newspaper in the state.

Did he talk about the need for a better database to manage the funds appropriated to the state’s numerous parks (which are beautiful, I might add)?

No, he wrote about anal sex. He wrote a newspaper to question the medical community on their strident belief that consensual butt fucking doesn’t kill angel babies.

It’s titled, “A One Way Alley for the Garbage Truck.”

Strap on.

The subject is homosexuality … is the science really settled on this issue or is it more the case that you feel silenced and intimidated?

Settled how?

Certainly there are board-certified doctors in our state who will attest to what seems self-evident to so many: gay sex is not good for the body or mind.

Uhhh. I’m not sure how a scientist can attest that gay sex is bad for the mind. That sounds to me like pseudoscience and not… you know, science.

But what does Steve Hickey think anal sex is like?

Pardon a crude comparison but regarding men with men, we are talking about a one-way alley meant only for the garbage truck to go down.

Ahh. Poo. He’s using garbage trucks as a metaphor for poo. But Mr. Hickey, literati, is not limited solely to metaphors. He’s got puns, too. Oh, he’s got puns.

South Dakota docs, it’s time for you to come out of the closet and give your professional opinion on this matter like you capably and responsibly do on all the others.

Get it? Closet. Like the one… never mind. So, next question, Mr. Hickey: do you think being a homo is worse than eating fast food?

Somehow the message we are presently getting from the medical community is that eating at McDonalds will kill us but the gay lifestyle has no side effects.

Does he have facts* to back this claim up? Oh hell yes, he does.

*Not facts

This indeed is a matter of being on the wrong side of history considering that historically, homosexuality has been a notable marker of the downfall of past civilizations, not their rise.

Yes. Wait… no? No, it’s hasn’t been. But there’s no time to debate, because we need to some nonsensical shit about the transgender community.

Forty-one percent of those who struggle with Gender Dysphoria attempt suicide, that’s twenty-five times the rate of the general population– certainly tragic and urgent but not a word from the medical and psychological communities? So really, we are letting our basketball coaches sort it out while ACLU lawyers look carefully over their shoulders!?

You can read the whole masterpiece here.

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