Introducing The ‘Bill Gates’ Condom Of The Future
Not gonna lie, I’d expect the next generation of condoms to come out of Japan or someplace where they spend a lot of time making incredibly random products that everyone flips shit over. Every now and then we need a nice underdog to throw everyone off balance, so today’s product comes out of Australia. No, it’s not vegemite or insect spray, it’s literally the thinnest condom I’ve seen in my life.
The condom itself is made out of hydrogel, which, if you’re like me and don’t know jack shit about science-sounding words, consists of
“…pretty much nothing but water held together by a small amount of long molecular chains called polymers. Hydrogels are soft (think squishy)…”
Well if marketing your condoms as “squishy” doesn’t make ’em sell like hot cakes, I don’t know what will. Despite the genius advertising strategy, hydrogel actually sounds like you’d be putting essentially nothing on your dick, considering that
“The short explanation is that they can be designed to feel more like human skin than latex rubber. They can also be completely transparent, so they will be invisible…so we hope to deliver a condom that is safe and feels and looks better.”
I have a picture in my mind of Buffalo Bill running around wearing a human skin condom, which is particularly confusing because he’s also wearing women’s clothing like in Silence of the Lambs.
But hey, if ya can’t feel it and ya can’t see it, is it really there?