This Mother Effin DEADLY JAGUAR Was Filmed Roaming Around Tucson, Arizona So Hide Yo Kids, Hide Yo Wife

Footage was captured of an extremely rare jaguar roaming around parts of Tucson, Arizona. The giant and deadly cat was filmed using cameras with motion sensors, and the cat’s been making all sorts of headlines as the sighting of a jaguar in America is practically unheard of these days. This magnificent beast was seen crossing streams, roaming the woods, and doing all sorts of shit that majestic jaguars do. This is the ONLY KNOWN JAGUAR to be living in the United States right now:

I guess this actually gives me an opportunity to talk about something I learned recently. A few weeks ago I was down in Mexico to see the band Phish play 3 concerts at a resort in the Yucatan Peninsula (the greater Cancun area). A lot of crusty ass hippies tried to sneak into these concerts, some succeeded, but one of the nights we were making jokes about all the hippies hiding out in the jungle waiting for their chance to rush the concert venue (which was the beach).

Someone mentioned something about ‘I bet one of them’s gonna get eating by a fucking jaguar’ to which I responded probably not, because I thought Jaguars were more southern (Costa Rica, Panama, and on down into South America). Well, I was wrong and as it turns out there’s over 2,000 jaguars estimated to be roaming the fucking jungles around Cancun and the Yucatan Peninsula…Who knew, right?

For more on this Jaguar you an click on over to the LA Times!