Here’s The Real Reason Jared Started Eating Subway And It’s Thanks To His Extensive Porn Collection In College

by 3 years ago  •  5 Comments
Premiere Of Disney Pixar's "Monsters University" - Arrivals

Getty Image


It’s not a good week to be Jared Fogle, though to be fair, the guy has had a pretty solid run and it’s about time he get knocked down a couple pegs.

The police knocked on Jared’s door early today all like “ding dong, we’re looking for child porn, don’t mind us.” The raid comes two months after Russell Taylor, the executive director of The Jared Foundation, was arrested on federal child pornography charges. Fogle saw this coming like heartburn after a BMT.

Jared Fogle and porn, of the normal variety, have a storied history. Allegedly, Fogle was quite the businessman in his undergrad days at Indiana University and would peddle porn out of his dorm room. He made such a killing, he barely left his room. Here’s how it all led to his eventual ties to Subway.

“His porn collection was vast and extensive, and Fogle took his business pretty seriously. A video would run a patron a dollar a day (cheap!),” wrote Michelle Collins, of Best Week Ever. “And people would come from all over to take advantage of the deal. Needless to say, Jared had enough porn to keep his customers happy.”

Apparently school and his thriving business kept Fogle so busy that the formerly 400-pound student became almost entirely sedentary and started eating Subway because it opened on the first floor of his dorm and was the closest option available. So, this grand fairytale of fast food inspired weight loss was born in service of Fogle’s alleged profession of renting spank films to other horny dorm bros.

So it’s not like they used to say in the commercials, that Jared made a “life change” and started eating Subway and getting healthy. He was just too lazy to leave his dorm in case some guy came looking for Butt Sluts 7 on Beta-Max.

[via Death and Taxes]


TAGSJared Foglejared from subwaylawPorn

Join The Discussion


Comments are closed.