Thanks To Pornography, Kids These Days Are ‘The Most Depraved Of Anyone In Human History’

by 2 years ago
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Congrats, teens!

While everyone constantly rags on you for being a drain on society, and not yet understanding the important things in life, and generally being moody and bitchy, you all now have something you can hang your flat-brimmed hats on.

Y’all are the biggest perverts in all of human history. More freaky than the French in the 1700s, dirty than the Mongols who fucked all over the steppes of Asia, naughtier than even your parents who … yea, they liked to get down.

And it’s all thanks to the wonders of pornography! In an article by The Economist dubbing you guys ‘Generation XXX,’ it hands you the title of most perverted ever. Humans have been around for two million years! That’s something to be proud of.

Because of smartphones, tablets and laptops, hardcore material can be accessed privately by anyone. The result is that many teenagers today have seen a greater number and variety of sex acts than the most debauched Mughal emperor managed in a lifetime.

The Mughal’s wrote the book on sex. Quite literally. The Karma Sutra. Nowadays though, the average 14-year-old’s brain puts that encyclopedia to shame.

Porn’s influence was evident in [teens] understanding of sex more generally. The researchers asked them to name all the sexual practices they knew of. They listed many porn tropes, such as threesomes and gang bangs, and some scatological and extremely violent acts made notorious by particular clips and films.

Yum. But fret not, freaky youngins. Every generation has been grosser than the previous.

Ever since Palaeolithic humans worked out how to paint and carve, new media have been used for sexually explicit representations. Some of the earliest photographs and films depicted disrobing or nude women.

Humanity. All about that V, all the damn time. The problem is, even a cartoon series can’t show a dude hand jabbing a clitoris repeatedly the way most porn does, and some are afraid that for all your knowledge, you kids won’t know how to fuck.

The sharpest fears concern teenagers, now likely to see a vast amount of pornography long before becoming sexually active. Will they fail to understand how unrealistic it is? What are the pneumatic female stars and ever-ready, freakishly endowed male ones doing to their viewers’ body images and self-esteem?

Prove ’em wrong teens. Do it like adults.

[Thanks Al for this tip]


TAGSmillennialsPornTeens

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