Here’s Why McDonald’s Chicken McNuggets Come In Only 4 Distinct Shapes

McDonald's chicken nuggets chipped a Florida man's tooth and he's now suing for $1.1 million

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If you prefer Chicken McNuggets at McDonald’s to the Big Mac (I do!) then you’ve probably taken notice of the nugget shapes over the years.

There are four distinct shapes, McDonald’s refers to them as the ball, the boot, the bell, and the bow-tie. If you’d have presented me those four words and asked ‘Cass, what do these 4 names have in connection with a popular fast food item?’ I’d have been fucking clueless. All I see when I look at McDonald’s Chicken McNuggets is deliciously fried tan chicken, and I prefer not to spend too much time analyzing what it is I’m eating. Though Chicken McNuggets really aren’t that bad at all and this video showing how they’re made proves that the horror stories are all urban legend.

Anyways, this is one of those news stories that makes the rounds every few years and for whatever reason we’re amidst another upswing in the viral news cycle of why McDonald’s has 4 distinct shapes of Chicken McNuggets. Here’s the answer, via Metro UK:

As to why there are only these four shapes, McDonald’s says that having four shapes is ‘the perfect equilibrium of dipability and fun.’
‘Three would have been too few,’ they write. ‘Five would’ve been, like, wacky.
‘We also make them similar in size to ensure consistent cooking times for food safety.’

The fuck did I just read? ‘The perfect equilibrium of dipability and fun’. That…that is not a way to describe eating chicken nuggets. And I don’t see why five is too many?! This seems like total nonsense.

Maybe in this instance ‘fun’ is actually an acronym for ‘Fucked Up Notions’ and they’re secretly trolling us for believing their asinine explanation. Or maybe they really think that 4 shapes are actually fun, who knows?

(h/t Metro UK)