7 Annoying Ways Dudes Have It Easier Than Chicks: A Rebuttal
As the “girl with lots of guy friends” – I love the male perceptive on almost everything. It’s a breath of fresh air, especially after nights out with the girls making bad decisions; or the truth you need to hear about that guy you met that isn’t calling back.
I have to disagree when with BroBible though when they write about chicks having it easier! Sure, maybe in these specific 5 ways, and yes we are still taking over the world embracing those 5 ways, but… at the end of the day, there are more than 5 ways dudes have it easier than chicks, and they are not just annoying but infuriating.
The first three are in response to the latest “5 Annoying Ways Chicks Have It Easier Than Dudes” on BroBible, the rest are just obvious things that Krum forgot.
It might cost you your arm, sack, and left toe to be that schmuck with VIP bottle service like the watering hole for the hot gazelle’s at the club, but I can bet you those same gazelle’s spend more time waiting on line for the bathroom than giving that schmuck any attention. Face the facts, dudes pee in a matter of seconds, no TP required, the line is always shorter, and it just isn’t fair.
2. Hooking up
Once a female is at a certain level of intoxication, ball is in your court. You’d be surprised at how often chicks don’t get approached and are sitting and waiting for the opp to just leave with the first guy that does. You don’t think that if we’re smart enough to run the world, we haven’t figured out that we should not be trying to find our dream guy at a club on a Friday night. Awesome if it works out, but YEAH RIGHT. After 12AM, you can have whatever you want, may not be your flavor, but you’ll get some ice cream if you care for it.
3. Working out
Sorry Krum, but most chicks need a lot more that 20 minutes on the elliptical. Those that actually work hard to be hotter and in shape find dudes’ workouts to be a JOKE. All you need to do is lift some weights, do a little cardio, eat grilled chicken, egg whites, protein shake and muscle milk, and before you know it Fatty McFatter from the local library can be front and center on beefcake central bagging chicks in less than 2 months if he wanted to. While back at the ranch, local Weight Watchers rather, chicks are counting points equivalent to the food they’re eating praying to God they lose .05 lbs by next weigh-in.
You don’t give birth…unless you’re Thomas Beatie. Nor do you get a monthly reminder of the fact that you can.
Unless you’re Pauly D, your hair is far easier and faster to manage. While we’re on the topic… it’s also easier for you to get dressed at any point of the day, be-it in the morning for work, or right before the cabs arrive to go out.
You’ll probably always get paid more than us, from CEO to waitress, “Yet nearly half a century later, in the first three months of 2012, women still earned only 82.2 percent of what men earned.” via Business Week:
One more, just to bring it back full circle,
7. Nightlife, Part 2
Most of you (with the exception of like 60% of NYC men) are taller than us, therefore while I’m NOT at the schmuck’s VIP watering hole and shoving to get past you to get the bartenders attention, you’ve already made eye contact with him or her over my head, and their off pouring you and your dudes’ Jameson shots.
So yea Krum and BroBible, let’s be serious here… who REALLY has it easier?
Agree, disagree? Comment below!