There Is So Much Poop In The Pork You Eat. So Much Poop.

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Really no need to bury the lede here, so let’s start with the money quote.

‘It’s not whether or not people are going to eat shit— they are. It’s just how much,’ one [pork] inspector said about the new HIMP regulations, according to documents released by the Government Accountability Project.

That shit’s not the only shit you’ll be eating, either.

“On numerous occasions I witnessed them [company inspectors] fail to spot abscesses, lesions, fecal matter, and other defects that would render an animal unsafe or unwholesome.”

“Other contamination such as hair, toenails, cystic kidneys, and bladder stems has increased under HIMP [pilot program]. Line speeds don’t make it any easier to detect contamination. Most of the time they are running so fast it is impossible to see anything on the carcass.”

Yum. Okay, now let’s explain what’s going on. The HIMP you see in those quotes stands for Hazard Analysis & Critical Control Points Inspection Models, which is a new program that, instead of allowing government inspectors to review animals, lets corporations handle the bulk of checking to see if food is fit for human consumption. And, surprise, companies interested in making money are somewhat less interested in making sure you don’t eat shit. From the Daily Mail.

Whistleblowers from inside the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) have spoken out against a recent pilot program, saying they let harmful materials be passed on to consumers.

They claim that fewer inspectors and higher speeds mean that abscesses, lesions, cystic kidneys and bladder stems are also being put into meat by companies such as Hormel.

You’ve probably had a Hormel product within the past few years, which means you’ve probably had some pig poop. Or a bladder stem. Which just sounds foul.

[The HIMP program] has been run as a pilot program in five slaughterhouses since the late 1990s and cut the number of government inspectors by about half in each plant.

The changes are thought to increase the line speed of the meat factories from 1,100 to 1,300 hogs killed per hour, making it near impossible to check each pig carcass.

Three of the five plants have numerous violations for health and safety issues, according to the Washington Post.

Those violations include the aforementioned pig shit, along side a whole host of others. So much so that inspectors say “Nuh uh”

‘Personally, I will not eat any products that bear the name of the company for which this meat is produced. I don’t think that it is wholesome or safe to consume,’ [Joe Ferguson, a recently retired inspector said.

So, eat up. Wait, don’t eat up. That’s what I meant to say.