Take it from me, weddings are immensely overrated. In 2015, the AVERAGE cost of a wedding was a mind-blowing $32,641!!! That’s $32K for a 4-hour dinner for your shitty relatives that you don’t even like. For that same chunk of change you can get a brand-spanking-new BMW 320i sedan. Forget providing a $200 dinner for people who only give you a $75 check. Forget spending $7,500 on flowers that die. Here’s what you do, plan your honeymoon somewhere nice like Aruba, St. Martin or Turks and Caicos. Have your wedding on a serene beach and have it live-broadcasted to a site where all of your friends and relatives can witness it. And also have a link to a crowdfunding site where your relatives and friends can give you a nice wedding gift of CASH. No candlestick holders, no fucking panini press, and no giant pillows that say, “LOVE” from Pier One. If you can’t pay for your honeymoon upfront, you can also have a low-cost wedding like this couple in New Zealand had.
No tuxedos. No wedding dress. No fancy venue with purple lights. These lovebirds have a simple wedding. Friends, family, a wedding officiant, and beer. What else do you fucking need?
Witness the marital bliss that Ange and Cody are experiencing on their romantic wedding day. The glowing bride pounded 40-oz beers and wore her finest dress while her beau was dressed in his favorite Black Power gang t-shirt. Instead of “I do,” Cody opted for the word “yoza,” while his bride gave her consent to marriage with a fist pump (Guess Jersey Shore just made it to New Zealand). She was probably too choked up with emotion in the moment of sheer happiness.
There was an open bar, which was actually a kiddie pool with alcoholic beverages.
If only all women understood the simplicity and the economic advantages of a low-key wedding such as this. These two are fiscal geniuses.
Congratulations to the newlyweds!!! To a lifetime of happiness and 40-oz beers.