This PSA Explores The Traumatic Effects DAD JOKES Can Have On Kids Everywhere–And I Laughed

Nickelodean coming in HOT!

You tell a dad joke to a chick a bar, it’s a done deal. Request an Uber and prepare to bang in the back seat of it because dad jokes are like fishing with dynamite. There’s a reason every single dad on the planet has had sex, and it’s sure as hell not because of dad jeans or dad bods.

I have a couple jokes from my Daddio I can contribute to this conversation. I plan on using them on my kids. If I ever have them.

Dad: Have you heard the joke about the broken pencil?
Me: No.
Dad: Nevermind, it’s pointless.

Dad: Have you heard the one about the roof?
Me: No, dad. FUCK.
Dad: Ah, forget it, it’s over your head.

MY TURN!

Me: Hey Paps, ol’ buddy ol’ pal, have you heard the joke about vagina?
Dad: Um.
Me: Nevermind, YOU WON’T GET IT. BOOM ROASTED, BITCH!

….

Dad: That’s not what your mom said last night. While you thought we watching Dateline.

FUCK YOU DAD. FUCKKKKKKKK YOUUUUU!!!!!!!

Dad: She did.

[h/t Some E-Cards]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.