Dude Nicknamed ‘Rubber Man’ May Be The Most Flexible Man On The Planet, While I Struggle To Touch My Toes

 

Jaspreet Singh Kalra, a 15-year-old from Punjab, India, can stretch his body in positions that your favorite pornstar cannot.

The dude has taught himself how to twist his head around 180 degrees and his arms a full 360 degrees, on top of contorting his body into positions that I have trouble describing in words.

Kalra hopes to be the number one contortionist in the world and turn this hobby into a lucrative career. He appears on the latest season of ‘India’s Got Talent’ on April 18.

Meanwhile, I can’t stretch my hammies at the gym without feeling the heat of volcano lava rushing down my entire leg.

Sidetone: Odds that this dude has sucked his own dick in the past 24 hours: 700%.

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.