Ladies, These Are The Worst Things That You Can Do During Sex (According To Men)

A poorly placed finger (or fingernail), an unfortunate slip of the tongue, the complete absence of any and all emotion…These are things that can ruin sex in the heat of the moment.

And before we get into all the ways to ruin sex that are listed below I just want to say this first: guys can just as easily ruin sex in an instant as women can, and this is in NO WAY one-sided. I’m simply going off the responses provided below from a thread titled ‘Guys, what is the least pleasant thing girls often try to do while having sex?’ in which nearly 5,000 guys talked about the quickest ways a woman can ruin sex. I hope that in the future women provide their responses so I can do a follow-up article to this, but I have no guarantees.

Now before I rant too much let’s check out the most common ways that a woman can ruin sex in a matter of seconds, according to the men of the Internet.


Colloquially known as the ‘dead fish’ syndrome:

Dylinquency:
Doing literally nothing.

NewWorldOrder781:
Just to be clear when we say nothing we mean nothing. Not trying to actively keep your legs open without us holding them there, no kissing, no moaning, no facial enthusiasm, cold blank stares and us grinding on top of you for 30 or more minutes. Also no foreplay generally after we just ate you out for 15 minutes.


GreatNorthernHouses:
Fake porn moans, stop that, make your real sounds. Real sounds are beautiful and erotic.


Froddoyo:
When they try to hump as your humping and everything falls off beat. then you gotta restart your momentum

Raedek:
Or when it’s foreplay and she is grinding on you and crushes your balls. Mood killer based solely off the fact that I’m crippled for the time being


mysterious_baker:
Getting too damned rough with the balls. Those things are sensitive ladies, and are easily hurt.
My fiancee and I have been together for 5 years, and I still have to remind her about it. You want to treat them like eggs, not tennis balls.


ModernLoverr:
Using your teeth while you give a blow job. God damn I still can’t forget this one chick giving literally most painful worst blowjob I ever had.


Ilikewaterandjuice:
Starting a non sexy conversation while we are doing it. Is this really the time to comment that we need milk?


Claymandingo:
Recently I was with a girl who I guess thought screaming at the top of her lungs was hot. Wouldn’t have been so weirded out if it wasn’t so fucking random. I would just be going at it and after a good minute or two she would just scream for about 5 seconds and then quiet again for a minute. It really just scared me more than anything. But a beautiful nickname came from it since we met in a Harry Potter themed ethics class. My roommate still asks about how moaning myrtle is


LotteryofJustice:
Riding on top, the girl leans all the way back. Sure great experience for you but it doesn’t bend too well.


PostCool:
I had a girlfriend that got off on spreading the hole on top of my penis open and flicking the slit with her tongue like she was eating a very tiny vagina. It was random as hell and it really didn’t feel all that great. She was gorgeous though, so I put up with that shit for awhile. Thanks for letting me share.


LivingShadowz:
am a virgin but it was a huge turn off when im about to cum and my grandma brings in my folded laundry.. jesus christ grandma knock for once


AssholeBot9000:
Well when my ex was having sex, she was doing it with another guy and I found it pretty unpleasant.


randydev:
Well, not often, but my gf once shouted “ALLAHU AKBAR” when she got on top of me.


BrisketWrench:
When they jerk you off like they’re trying to start a campfire in the palm of their hand w/your dick


funktion1lambda:
Grab on to the nutsac like its a subway handle. It’s not there to stabilize your drunk ass.


Grimsterr:
Handjobs, listen honey, you could practice from now till Armageddon and you’d not have as much experience as me at jacking my junk.


capthowdy0000:
When they focus on the tip too much during a bj. That’s the most sensitive part.


Ayoeh:
Jerking me like she’s secretly The Flash.


And last but not least…

UNDERARMOURSUCKS:
She loves to get on top of me but I hate it because she can always see me cry.


Well, ladies, if you’re still reading this I hope you gained some practical knowledge today that can be used in the bedroom. And if you’d like to hop in the comments with your list of ways that men quickly ruin things in the bedroom I’m sure all of us here would love to learn a thing or two, because we’re all open-minded givers 🙂

By the way, all of these responses came from an AskReddit thread which you can read in full by clicking HERE.

Changing gears a little bit, I want to make sure that ALL OF YOU know about the all new BroBible iOS app that was launched last week. It’s 100% free to download and it’s the latest/greatest way to get all of your BroBible content, so DOWNLOAD IT FOR FREE BY CLICKING HERE!

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Cass Anderson is the Editor-in-Chief of BroBible. Based out of Florida, he covers an array of topics including NFL, Pop Culture, Fishing News, and the Outdoors.