This employee named “Ron” was put on disciplinary probation at his workplace when he was caught with a large can of beer under his desk, which is a direct violation of the strict rules in the employee handbook.
The problem is that “technically” this man did not bring any alcohol into the workplace.
Yes. That is indeed a fully functioning fleshlight cleverly hidden inside of a can of beer. What a fucking beer! And while making sweet love to a rubber snatch may very well be intoxicating, it is not alcohol. And I would bet the ranch that there are no stipulations in the employee handbook prohibiting fleshlights which would put a large and fuckable hole in their prosecution. So this customer service representative probably could have gotten off if he told his boss that it was just a sex toy and not a scary beer. Explaining why you have a fuck toy at work might not be worth all the trouble however and may explain your lengthy bathroom breaks.
Like I completely understand where this guy’s heart is on this decision. There’s no doubt in my head that Ron is a dedicated employee who puts in extra hours at work and wants to give it his all at his job. He probably told himself, “You do your best work when you’re relaxed, and nothing relaxes you quite as much as blowing a load into a rubber cocksocket.” What? You have something against making your employees feel at home to maximize their production?
Hard to believe, but there’s actually some flawed logic with bringing a rubber fuck toy that’s “disguised” as a beer can into the office, not to mention some possible sexual harassment lawsuits and maybe even health code violations.
On a side note, this is the coolest Transformer I’ve ever seen since Grimlock from the Dinobots.