Although Telly Shadell Corey, 41, was eventually arrested for masturbating for “up to three hours” while riding a Megabus, can we really blame him if we look deep, down in our hearts? Megabus is awful. It is literally, literally, the WORST bus you could ever choose to travel on.
I have been on Megabuses that were three hours late, I have been on Megabuses where they oversold the seats and had to kick people off, and I have been on Megabuses where they broke down in the middle of the New Jersey turnpike and then told the passengers to dodge traffic as we transferred to our replacement bus, two hours later.
And while no, I wouldn’t want to sit next to a guy planning to spend the entire trip masturbating, I wouldn’t be surprised if it happened. This is Megabus we’re talking about – you may as well glue a scooter to your ass and start pushing yourself down the street. Both methods of transportation are equivalent in terms of time, money and comfort.
Now that you know what a giant, flaming dumpster fire of petty cash Megabus is, would you still take one if you knew you’d have to sit next to Telly, even if your ticket was extremely cheap?
Cops were called Sunday afternoon to a bus station in Coralville, an Iowa City suburb, to meet an arriving Megabus.
According to acriminal complaint, officers were told that passenger Telly Shadell Corey, 41, “was on the bus with his penis exposed to a female passenger that was terrified.”
A subsequent investigation determined that Corey initially “played with his penis in his sweatpants.” He then “ended up exposing his penis and masturbating for up to three hours because he thought the victim was enjoying it.”
After being read his rights, Corey reportedly copped to the marathon pleasure session and told police he thought “since the victim didn’t say anything to him she was enjoying it.”(via)
Upon being arrested, Telly was charged with indecent exposure and held in lieu of a $2,500 bond.
[H/T The Smoking Gun]