Uber Drivers Revealed Some Of Their Most WTF Stories, Proving Once Again Humans Are GD Nuts

By 07.07.16
uber drivers most wtf stories

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Being an Uber driver, much like a taxi driver, one must run into a whole lot of, how shall I put it, odd people. Yeah, that works. And much like bartenders, drivers of these vehicles also often get to hear stories that were probably left unspoken.

For example, ALL of these stories on the “Ask Reddit” thread, “Uber drivers, what’s the deepest secrets you’ve overheard in your car?” were definitely better left unsaid.

Then again, if they went unsaid we wouldn’t be entertained here today by just how bizarre and awful people are. God love the internet.

Here are some of the best/worst of the bunch…

Former Uber driver here. Picked a girl up a sweet girl from a bar on a Wednesday night – absolutely hammered, about 10pm. She got into my car, apologized for being so drunk and politely asked if we could just drive around a little while, with the windows down.

I was prepping for a cleaning fee, trying to drive and pull a vomit bag out of the glove box, but no, she just did that airplane thing with one hand out the backseat window. She asked me if I had ever thought about dying, to which I replied, yeah – I guess so.

That’s when she told me that she had cancer. It was in her brain and it was too far gone to consider chemo. I remember my heart just pounding. She told me she was dying and she was going to be okay. Tonight she was celebrating with her work friends who threw her a going-away party. She told them she was taking a position abroad.

“I just didn’t tell them that abroad was heaven.”

Jesus. Fucking. Christ. I turned off my app and cried my ass all the way home. ~ westport76

I picked up this young overly affectionate couple that spent the entire trip making out in my backseat and telling each other that they loved each other. Cute.

So I drop off the couple and head on my way to pick up my text fare. I hear a cellphone ring in my backseat, realize it’s my previous ride’s, and pick up the phone to let them know I have it and I’ll come back to drop it off. Turns out it was the guys wife phoning to check in on him while he was on a business trip, which he was thoroughly enjoying with his mistress. ~ YetiPie

One time I was driving a dude for a bit of a long trip. Was gonna take around 25-30 minutes. He wasn’t hammered, but definitely a bit drunk. It was late and he must’ve been feeling a bit down, so he confided in me and asked me for some advice.

He told me he’s madly in love with his fiancé’s best friend and he couldn’t back out now. He’d been with this girl 4 years, and engaged for 1, ready to be married in a few months.

It was pretty sad to hear, because it wasn’t just your average story. It was filled with a lot of subtle emotional and mental anguish. The guy went through about 5 years of ups and downs with his girl, and found an innocent friend and comfort in the best friend. After a few years, he developed feelings and it was just downhill from there.

Felt bad for the guy because he seemed like he was truly in love with his fiancé too, although he had strong feelings for this friend. He knew that going through with the marriage meant a lifetime of being around the friend and suppressing feelings, but also breaking it off meant that he lost the girl of his dreams. Seemed like a genuinely nice guy, and I hope he’s doing okay. ~ clever_username7

Drove UBER one night… it was pretty tame until I picked up two guys who wanted to go to a strip club 40 miles away. As they requested an UberSelect fare I was happy to drive that far. ($80-100) It took them 15 minutes to get ready and into the car and they seemed cool so I wasn’t worried.

As soon as we got on the freeway the guy in the passenger seat started asking about UBER driving and things got dark. After a few minutes he started saying shit like “what would you do if someone just grabbed the steering wheel and ran the car into the median” and “have you ever thought about what would happen if someone in the back seat tried to strangle you while you were driving?” I got a little freaked out and tried to lighten the mood by asking what they were celebrating, etc, but the one guy just kept at it.

I was happy to get to the strip club and get them the hell out of the car. Bonus was the bouncer at the club gave me $40 for dropping them off there. I never drove UBER again. Fuck that. ~ asudan30


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