Why ‘YOLO’ Needs To Die!
At this rate, it’s only a matter of time before YOLO replaces the 5th amendment. As silly as that sounds, it’s not too far fetched. We are a non-conventional generation almost to a fault and the way we follow trends, why couldn’t it happen? This is a scenario that will 100% occur within the next 50 years:
Judge: Sir you have been charged with legitimate rape, how do you plea?
Defendant: Well sir after seein’ ‘Dat ass’ I couldn’t help it… I plea the YOLO.
Judge: Why didn’t you say something earlier HAHA you only live once! Give this man a hooker and some meth!
YOLO is a terrifying mentality and yet we decorate it in neon on our shirts and shout it at the top of our lungs at bars telling the world how much we don’t give a f*ck, but at the end of the day we do give a f*ck and that’s why we conform to the stupidity that YOLO has brought out in all of us. I don’t want to be an Ervin McKinness, I don’t want my obituary to read, “Aristotle Georgeson was a good son and an average comedian who died because of YOLO. He is survived by no one because he had no f*cks to give.” Next time you are about to shout YOLO or wear a neon shirt that says YOLO, think about this article and then find the nearest pool to drown yourself in because YOLO. No but seriously stop saying it, it’s really annoying and all you’re doing is promoting Drake’s terrible rapping.
Aristotle is a Florida based comedian who thinks that Drake is the Nickelback of the rap game. You can follow him on Twitter @sToTle.