You’ll Never Guess What Police Arrested This Senior Citizen For

You know why most people get pulled over and busted while driving? Traffic stops. Not because anyone was doing bong rips out of a sunroof or snorting coke off a windshield wiper, but because for some reason people traveling with large amounts of drugs like to speed and not wear their seatbelts. This brings us to Robert Short who, at the ripe ol’ age of 64, decided to go driving with a friend.

Fresno police say they made a routine traffic stop on Robert Short, 64, at Olive and Rowell on Saturday night and found he had meth in his car. Investigators then went to Short’s apartment near Willow and Butler, where they say he was cooking and distributing drugs.

Via ABC 30

Oh wait, I forgot to mention his friend was a 4 oz. bag of meth. Eh, better late than never. Apparently that’s a lot of meth according to police, although if you compare it to a McDick’s quarter pounder which is also 4 oz….well okay that’s a fair amount of powder. And because someone rollin’ round town with a cheeseburger’s worth of meth is probably dealing, cops channeled their inner Billy Mays and thought “Wait, there’s more!”

“After searching his apartment, they found a half pound of meth, heroin and materials for a meth lab. ‘Just shocking someone that age would do that, but actually a perfect place to do it, right? Retirement village, who would suspect it going on there?” said Gomez. Police say the street value of the meth Short was carrying is close to $1,700. They also found scales and baggies in his car for the sale of meth.”

I’ve been told that old people need hobbies once they retire or else they get stale and die faster, but I’m not quite sure “becoming your neighborhood meth kingpin” counts as a casual hobby. To be fair though, I’d choose dealing drugs over playing Bingo every night of the week…or death. Death sounds nice compared to Bingo too.