Brian Scalabrine Announces Return to Boston Celtics Broadcast Booth With Parody of LeBron James’ Letter
Brian Scalabrine’s sense of humor is what allowed him to become one of the most popular players in the NBA. God knows it wasn’t due to his on-court talent.
After hanging up his off-brand sneakers and sharpened elbows, the White Mamba is returning to the Boston Celtics as a television analyst. Because he is a gifted and talented individual, Scalabrine used the opportunity to author a tremendous letter announcing the move.
Inspired by LeBron James’ heartfelt essay, Scalabrine tells his Beantown love story with great flourish.
I could sit here and pull a quote at random — and it would be spectacular. Seriously, I don’t want to oversell this thing, but it is one of the finer items I’ve seen on SPORTS INTERNET in a long while.
Like James, Scalabrine’s letter isn’t peppered with promises of future greatness — just a vow to do his best.
I’m not promising a championship. I know how hard that is to deliver. We’re not ready right now. No way. Of course, I want to win next year, but I’m realistic. I’m only a broadcaster – what could I really do? It will be a long process, much longer than in 2008. My patience will get tested. I know that. I’m going into a situation with a young team and a young coach. I will be the young Comcast SportsNet announcer in the booth next to the legendary Mike Gorman and learn from the greatest color analyst in the game Mr. Tommy Heinsohn. I know that I have a lot to learn but I see myself as a Champion, and I think I can help break down some great Marcus Smart dunks this season. I think I can elevate Kelly Olynyk’s game by the amount of research I make my interns do before announcing road games. And I can’t wait to reunite with Rajon Rondo, one of my favorite teammates. Paul, KG, and Ray may have all left, but Rondo and the White Mamba remain in Boston, at least for now.
Now that … that is interesting writing.
Kudos to Scalabrine for going above and beyond the call of duty. It’s good to see he’s diving for metaphorical loose balls even as his playing career fades into the rearview window.
[H/T: CSN New England]