Chad Ochocinco Took To Instagram To Say That He Has A Three Inch Dick And I Don’t Believe It

 

I haven’t seen many dicks in my life, but I’ve seen enough. That being said, in my little experience, there are two guarantee when it comes to dicks. If a dude says they have a big dick, it’s smaller than they say. And if they say they have a small dick, it’s bigger than they say. Why? Not sure, that’s just how the world works. It’s probably because the dudes with small dicks are afraid of getting made fun of while the dudes with big dicks are afraid of scaring away chicks.

Which is why I don’t believe Chad Ochocinco for a second when he brags about having a 3 inch dick.

View this post on Instagram

2 months of McDonald's before each workout

A post shared by Chad Johnson (@ochocinco) on

Bullshit. So much bullshit. Bullshit everywhere. Just a money shot of bullshit right into our faces. That entire video is just one long diatribe of bullshit. The guy hasn’t worked out in two months and has only been eating McDonald’s in the meantime? Garbage. You eat McDonald’s twice in one day and you gain 5 pounds. I also do not believe that he has bigger tits than his girl nor do I believe that he only has one girl. No way this dude doesn’t measure a woman’s chest from front to back in order to make sure those pillows are worth him plopping his head down on. And if they’re not but he still loves her personality, dude’s dumping money at a plastic surgeon’s door. But that dick comment. Jesus Christ. Just rub it our faces, bro. If he’s claiming three inches, that thing is probably like a fucking PVC pipe. I have enough competition out there without Ochocinco opening up his DM’s for girls to see for themselves how “fat” and “small” he actually is. Stick with the supermodels and groupies. Leave the Instagram chicks to the lowly non-athletes.