The Top 25 College Football Teams Re-Ranked Based On Their Fans’ Grammar Is Bad News For Bama

by 2 years ago

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As luck would have it, in the case of good grammar, what is bad for Bama is sensational for Auburn. Tigers fans are not only murdering the Crimson Tide when it comes to number of grammatical errors per 100 words (0.89 to 6.40 for Bama), but they are the only school ranked in the Top 25 with less than one mistake per hundo.

How the fuck was this even determined, you ask angrily?

Here is Grammarly’s methodology:

We began by taking the first five comments posted under each article on SB Nation’s official college football team blogs until we had gathered a total of 100 comments for each team. The comments contained at least 50 words and were posted within an average timespan of two months ending August 12, 2015.

Using Grammarly, we identified the errors in the comments, which were then verified and tallied by a team of live proofreaders. For the purposes of this study, we counted only black-and-white mistakes such as misspellings, wrong and missing punctuation, misused or missing words, and subject-verb disagreement. We ignored stylistic variations such as the use of common slang words, serial comma usage, and the use of numerals instead of spelled-out numbers.

Finally, we calculated the average number of mistakes per one hundred words by dividing the total word count of the comments by the total number of mistakes for each college football team.

Here’s how the rest of the Top 25 shook out.



So what does this all mean? ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING or JACK FUCKING SHIT? If you go to Auburn you’re probably thinking it’s the former, because you came in first and that feels nice, but if you have any common sense you would realize it’s definitely the latter. For the record, I don’t have a horse in this race — because the University of Miami football program is a fucking abomination — so I couldn’t be bothered to give even one fleck of shit about this, but you would have to be a delusional to think that anyone commenting online under the name RollTide6969 or KathrineWebbsTits1972 cares about grammar in those moments. Anyone who has ever read a comment section on the Internet knows that grammar is the the least of everyone’s concerns. The most of everyone’s concerns, however, is letting people know that the YouTube they just watched was both “fake and gay.”

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