Listen To Former Heisman Trophy Winner Troy Smith Forget The Alphabet Before Being Arrested For A DUI, Weed Possession

You bros remember Troy Smith? He played QB for Ohio State and won the Heisman in 2006, before spending a couple forgetful years as a backup for the Ravens and 49ers before trying his hand in the CFL. He also may be the only player to ever enter the NFL Draft who lobbied to play for the Cleveland Browns, his home state. May have been a better fit…

The 31-year-old has made news again after being arrested in Ohio after driving shitfaced and possession of weed.

According to TMZ,

TMZ Sports obtained the dashcam video shot by the Westerville, OH police officers when the Heisman Trophy winner was pulled over early Sunday morning. The cops put him through the field sobriety paces, which included reciting the alphabet — not even backwards — and Smith had to bail out early.

Smith also informed the officers he’d “graduated from Ohio State with a degree in bachelors.”

Check out the incriminating dash cam vid below:

Troy Smith needs to hook me up with his weed guy. Every single strand of bud I’ve ever smoked, I have been able to recite the alphabet with relative ease afterwards. If my drug dealer was like “you want the Cali Kush again or this new shit that makes your brain turn off after the first 9 letters of the ABCs?” I’ll take that Rosetta Stone shit 11 out of 10 times. You don’t need a degree in bachelors to navigate your way through that decision.

Keep your head up Troy and try to forget that this two year old would have passed the field sobriety test.

[h/t TMZ]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.