JJ Watt Has So Much Money He Had To Google ‘What Do Rich People Buy?’

On September 2nd, JJ Watt signed a $100 million contract extension, instantly making him Bruce Wayne rich. The only problem is that he has no idea what to spend his money on.

If JJ Watt needed to know what rich people spend money on then why the hell didn’t he just call me? The answer’s EASY bro: two chicks at the same time.

Didn’t you see Office Space? Everyone knows what you’re supposed to do when you get your first million. As for the other 99 million, there’s only one acceptable investment: a lazy river in your backyard…

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