For Some Reason Jordan Spieth Got An Intern And I Mean Sure, I Guess She’s Pretty Hot

I think the only way I know how to describe Jordan Spieth‘s existence is that it’s his world and we’re all just living in it. Try and think of one instance where Jordan Spieth didn’t live the life we all wanted to. You literally can’t.

Hence why I’m not surprised at all that not only did he somehow get an intern for whatever reason, but she’s also pretty hot.

Why does Spieth need an intern? Not a clue. I’m not sure what she’ll have to do except sit around and be a cute blond. What does a professional golfer even do that demands an intern? I feel like everything Spieth would task this girl with is important enough to hire an actual employee. Unless he’s just going to have her come to his tournaments in a bikini.

The girl, whose name is Kylee (two e’s, not making that one up) is an ASU student. She took to Twitter to tell the world all about how she got the gig.

Via Busted Coverage:

Well at least that wasn’t obnoxious. I don’t really see the reason why she’s interning for Spieth beyond the fact that her dad and his agent are drinking buddies. “You know what would be great? If Kylee could intern for Jordan!!” “Yeah!! Let me make some phone calls” *pours another stiff drink* “Oh wait, I don’t have to!!” *cue rich white men laughing*

Of course, with the announcement that Kylee was going to be hanging around Jordan “Who Doesn’t Want To Sleep With Me” Spieth, people started saying how Spieth was inevitably going to start dating her and how the only thing she’s really going to be learning from him is new sex positions yada yada yada. But it seems like everyone forgot that Spieth not only has a girlfriend already, but she’s fine. And not like “that’ll do” fine but “Damn, she’s fine” fine.

Hot take: Spieth’s girlfriend is actually beautiful. Kylee is hot, but not Annie Verret hot. She’s like side chick hot. You don’t want your side chick to be hotter than your main chick becuase then it mixes your signals. When you don’t want to leave your side chick’s pad because she’s hotter than your main chick, you know you fucked up. Because if you have to leave your main chick for your side chick, chances are said side chick also has a side guy and in turn it’s not out of the question that she’ll leave you for him. Regardless, I’m pretty sure that the real position Kylee lobbied for here: Spieth’s side chick. Every athlete has them. You’re delusional if you think otherwise. But at least Spieth is giving his some college credit as well as dick.