Just yesterday, Cleveland Indians third baseman Juan Uribe took a heater right to the fucking nuts. And when I say that, I mean it was a 106 mile per hour rope off the bat of former AL MVP Mike Trout.
Going down in a heap of pain, many of us probably wondered if Uribe was wearing a cup and, if not, why on fucking earth wouldn’t he have one on to protect his boys? We have our answer.
Juan Uribe said today he doesn't wear a cup because the trainers don't have one in his size…. Then he said I'm serious.
— Andre Knott (@DreKnott) June 13, 2016
This sort of reminds me of that one time at band camp where…
Anyway, whether or not Uribe’s candidness was in good fun or actually serious, the fact that he’s nursing a couple boys below the belt that are definitely swollen as all fuck today should be enough to believe that he was DEAD serious about his dong being gigantic.
That’s usually good news, but this is the opposite of that considering his injury.