The New Brewers Mascot Hank the Dog Won Opening Day

Hank the Dog is the Mike Trout of 2014. He is a phenomenon. A five-tool player.

LOOKEE THIS GUY.

Hank is a stray from Maryvale, Arizona—which apparently is completely run by strays, with a Stray Mayor and Stray Gang Leaders and a Stray City Council—who first made a national splash a month ago after showing up outside the Brewers’ Spring Training complex. He was adopted by the team, became an unofficial mascot, and when the Brewers made their trip back to Milwaukee, he tagged along. He was even signed by GM Doug Melvin. He is a phenomenon.

Hank now lives in Milwaukee with a member of the organization and on Opening Day yesterday, he literally got a standing ovation when he was introduced. It was reportedly the largest of the night.

Do I feel like an idiot writing any of this? No. No, I don’t.

Because he’s making his presence FELT at Miller Park.

Okay, that was apparently a hoax. But this is not: Hank is scheduled to be neutered soon as part of his transition into living in a household. Think of the devastated groupies.

[Photo: Benny Sieu/USA Today Sports]