While the Super Bowl is the biggest event on the planet each and every year, causing people to gamble like crazy, throw crazy parties and, of course, judge every single commercial, the one thing that’s a little too much is this whole Media Day thing.
A longstanding tradition of the Big Game, for the first time ever, Media Day became Media Night last night, as the league actually wanted to make it a prime time event. Of course they did. #Money
While there have been memorable moments, with a few players making a name for themselves because of it, there have been some really stupid questions, too, with these being the dumbest ever heard in the history of Super Bowl Media Day.
10. “Can you show the kids your game face?” (Super Bowl XXIV)
Asked to: St. Louis Rams head coach Dick Vermeil
Prepping to lead his Rams against the Tennessee Titans, when Dick Vermeil was asked to show his game face for the kids, it might seem like an outrageous request, right? Well, it was asked by Nickelodeon, so, I guess, it was in context of their viewership.
While lighthearted, what a fucking terrible waste of time. It’s a good thing Vermeil is such a good guy and did it, because had Bill Belichick been asked that, he would’ve blown the fuck up—which, in essence, is probably what his game face looks like anyway.
9. “Are you Vinson Smith?” (Super Bowl XXVII)
Asked to: Dallas Cowboys tight end Alfredo Roberts
Now, on the surface, this question asked to Alfredo Roberts who, at the time, was a tight end for the Dallas Cowboys, might not seem too outrageous. Maybe the reporter was just getting him confused with one of the other players in Super Bowl XXVII, right? That’s logical.
It’s too bad that wasn’t the case, though, as Vinson Smith wasn’t only not participating in the game, but he had played the entire season with the Chicago Bears, so why Roberts was asked if he was Smith is beyond any explanation worth wasting breath on.
8. “On a scale of 1 to 10, how ticklish are you?” (Super Bowl XLVII)
Asked to: Baltimore Ravens tight end Dennis Pitta
Yeah, the question was a fucking waste of time, but Pitta’s response was just about as perfect as anyone could expect, saying this:
“I’m probably a five or six. You know, moderately ticklish. Good question.”
I have a feeling the tight end wasn’t really being serious with that last part by complimenting the reporter who asked this, instead firing back with a little troll job of his own.
Maybe I’m wrong, but, regardless, asking the ticklish level of an NFL player isn’t something that should ever be said out loud—yet one reporter did it during the biggest media event on the planet. Bold, my friend.
7. “So why do they call you Boomer? (Super Bowl XXIII)
Asked to: San Francisco 49ers QB Joe Montana
Seeing as how the Joe Montana-led Niners were playing against the Cincinnati Bengals in Super Bowl XXIII—who had Boomer Esiason under center for them—this might have been a better thing to ask Montana’s counterpart on the other team.
It’s a good thing that the four-time Super Bowl champ is known as “Joe Cool,” because he brushed off the idiotic question without breaking a sweat or humiliating the reporter—which a ton of other guys would have probably done.
I’d like to see this happen today, though. Like, someone should have asked Peyton Manning why they call him “SuperCam” just to fuck with everyone.
6. “Does it seem a little strange answering football question in a baseball stadium?” (Super Bowl XXII)
Asked to: Dallas Cowboys QB Troy Aikman
Contrary to popular belief, the commentator Aikman did not ask the quarterback Aikman this dumbass question—although the current FOX analyst probably would.
With the game being played in the Rose Bowl that season and Media Day being held in Dodger Stadium, I guess some reporter just wanted to go down in infamy for asking something so stupid.
Even if Aikman hadn’t just said, “Not really,” and said something else, why in the fuck does anyone care? They wouldn’t have, which is exactly why the question falls on this list.
5. What are you going to wear in the game Sunday? (Super Bowl XXVII)
Asked to: Dallas Cowboys RB Emmitt Smith
Another classically moronic question from Super Bowl XXVII—maybe it was the L.A. sun that fried the brain’s of reporters?—because there’s no other way to even describe this question asked to the NFL’s all-time rushing leader, Emmitt Smith.
He wasn’t asked what he was wearing to the game—which would’ve been dumb, too—but the Cowboys’ runner was asked what threads he’d done during it. Uh, I don’t know, maybe the same Dallas uniform that his teammates have on.
Some fucking people, guys. It’s better to stop and think things through before opening your mouth, always remember that.
4. “Do you believe in voodoo, and can I have a lock of your hair? (Super Bowl XXIV)
Asked to: St. Louis Rams’ QB Kurt Warner
Warner, who, during the 1999 season, went from grocery store stock boy to Super Bowl champ, was the toast of the NFL that entire year, leading the high-octane Rams’ offense known as “The Greatest Show on Turf.”
Was it voodoo that got Warner to where he was, or just talent? Apparently, one reporter thought it might have been because of some funky shit the signal-caller did in his spare time.
That’s bizarre, but when Warner was asked for a lock of his hair as the second part of the question, I’d file that under the creepiest thing ever category. Like, that’s restraining order type of shit.
3. “Is it your mother who’s blind, and your father who’s deaf, or the other way around?” (Super Bowl XV)
Asked to: Oakland Raiders QB Jim Plunkett
Plunkett, who overachieved a lot to become MVP of Super Bowl XV by leading his Raiders to a victory over the Eagles, was actually asked this question by someone.
To give some context, both Plunkett’s mom and dad are legally blind, with the two actually meeting at a school for the blind. Still, like other outrageous questions on this list, why any reporter felt obligated to ask Plunkett this question is silly, and has nothing to do with football.
Hell, the person even botched it up totally, so he/she would have been wiser just keeping their mouth shut.
2. “Do you believe you can win?” (Super Bowl XXVIII)
Asked to: Buffalo Bills defender Cornelius Bennett
These days, there are all sorts of questions that lead to a total PC reply from an athlete, making it appear as if the guy was getting the words whispered directly into his ear.
Prior to his Bills playing in Super Bowl XXVIII—their fourth-straight trip to the game—Bennett was asked the question that no player should ever be asked… and he didn’t hold back on his reply, saying:
“What kind of question is that? What kind of question is that? What kind of question is that? That’s a fucking stupid question. I’m pissed you asked me that question. I didn’t come anywhere to lose.”
I get that the Bills did end up losing and fell to 0-4 during their Super Bowl trips in the ’90s, but, fuckin’ A, man, did the reporter think Bennett would say, “Nope, I think we’ll end up losing this one.”
1. “Doug, it’s obvious you’ve always been a black quarterback all your life. When did it start to matter?” (Super Bowl XXII)
Asked to: Washington Redskins QB Doug Williams
For those who forgot or just straight-up didn’t know, former Redskins signal-caller Doug Williams is African-American, so, yeah, of course he’s been a black quarterback his entire life.
What makes this the dumbest thing in Super Bowl Media Day history is the story that accompanies it, as the question has been twisted around over the years, with many actually believing that Williams was asked this: “How long have you been a black quarterback?
While the second instance would make this really fucking dumb, the fact that Williams was asked when it started to matter being a black quarterback is stupid in itself, and takes the cake for the dumbest ever.