‘Soap Hockey’ Looks Ridiculously Fun, And Also Seems Like A Great Way To Snap Your ACL

By 07.27.17

Growing up in Southwest Florida, ice skating and hockey were sports reserved for the financially privileged because it required traveling to/from an indoor arena year-round. There were only one of these arenas around and it was an hour drive, which meant you needed at least one parent who wasn’t working and capable of shuttling you to/from hockey practice. Roller hockey was much more prevalent, but it’s obviously not nearly as fast-paced and competitive as ice hockey.

I’m saying all this as I lead to the point that had we knew about ‘soap hockey’ I’m fairly certain this would’ve been the only sport we ever played. Sure, everyone got hyped on Roller Hockey after The Mighty Ducks: D2, and that phase would’ve happened regardless, but soap hockey looks like it was a sport tailor-made for Floridians.

For starters, playing Soap Hockey requires you to be a bit of a dumbass, which I am. Playing this game looks like the fastest conceivable way to lose a toenail or tear an ACL (or any other ligament). Soap Hockey also requires warm conditions, which we have for 11.5 months of the year here in the Sunshine State. It’s also a low-cost sport and something that can be played in the backyard. It’s so fucking hot down here (the heat index right now is ‘feels like 105’ with 92% humidity earlier today). We Floridians never stray far from our homes in the Summer because of the heat, and that means we can always be ready for a backyard game on the fly….So what I’m trying to say here is that we need to get a Soap League Rec League going down here in S.W. Florida…Who’s game? (h/t The Ocho)


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