It’s the week for MTV reality stars to do sex tapes, I guess. Every time I write about Buckwild, MTV’s newly-cancelled celebration of West Virginia common people doing the things that common people do (yelling at each other, getting wasted, dying because they’re too stupid to open a car window) people get really mad at me in the comments. Welp, here we go again.
TMZ has announced that two of the show’s stars, Shae Bradley and Jessie J, have a sex tape to sell. The video, which depicts the pair engaging in “trailer park sex” (she doesn’t even take her shirt off) was filmed before production on the show started, with the producers telling the pair to keep it covered up. Now that the show’s been cancelled, all bets are off – these people aren’t going to stay famous based on their natural intelligence, after all – and an unnamed party is shopping the video around to the usual suspects.
I have a hard time believing that there’s any market for this kind of thing in 2013. The concept of the “celebrity” sex tape is completely devalued, and these people aren’t even really celebrities. They had a camera pointed at them for a little while and the world is already moving on. Sure, Shae is sort of cute, but there are literally thousands of similarly cute girls already doing porn (and taking their shirts off). What makes her special?
In related sex tape news, after we wrote about the Farrah Abraham from Teen Mom “sex tape” (actually a staged porno shoot), things got even funnier. Farrah is pretty pissed at co-star James Deen for blowing the whole deal, and TMZ got her (and her mom) on video talking about it. She went on to make one of the funniest comments ever, saying that Deen has a small penis. Just to clarify: dude has been in 1,300 porn movies. They don’t let you be in 1,300 porn movies if you have a little dinger. Abraham also said that she wanted her sex tape to be “like a wedding video.” I gotta start going to more weddings.