I just moved out of my New York apartment and into one that has a dishwasher. For those unfamiliar, a dishwasher is a rare amenity in New York, but essentially all you do is put your dirty dishes in a large cavity, press a button, and boom, clean dishes. Gone are the days feeling like Rosie the fucking Riveter.
It has been one of the great joys of my life. Which says a lot about my life.
Just when I was starting to acquire some self-worth about my current position on this earth, I am reminded of people like Aaron Rodgers and Danica Patrick, who just fucked around and dropped $28 million in CASH on a mansion in Malibu, California.
According to TMZ, the property clocks in at 4,636 square feet, with four bedrooms, four bathrooms and a two-bedroom guesthouse in case Rodgers wants to reconnect with his family.
Photos via Zillow:
The home was purchased in 2017 for $19.25 million by Netflix COO Ted Sarandos and Nicole Avant, the daughter of legendary music mogul Clarence Avant. The power couple then had a change of heart and decided the property wasn’t bougie enough, thus purchasing the $34.5 million the Montecito, Calif. compound of Ellen DeGeneres and flipping the Malibu property to British pop star Robbie Williams and his wife.
This is a drop in a bucket for Patrick, who has an estimated net worth of $60 million, and Rodgers, who just signed a $134 million contract extension last year.
I couldn’t afford the fucking pillows.