Jadakiss Attempts To Defend His Sociopathic All-Crust Pizza Order But Should Still Get Life Without Parole

by 1 month ago

Noam Galai/Getty Images

As I write this, El Chapo is settling into America’s only supermax prison in Colorado, dubbed “The Alcatraz of the Rockies.” Inmates are allowed a television, but are only granted a 4-inch window in their cells to the outside world. Somehow, someway, Jadakiss has not forcibly joined him.

This week, it was revealed that the New York rapper prefers an all-crust pizza. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, no cheese, no sauce, no sense.

Brooklyn’s Cuts & Slices recently posted a picture of a custom pizza they made for Jadakiss last year, and the photo went viral for obvious reasons (public safety).

Everyone has a right to a defense, and the 44-year-old rapper has given his.

After a three-minute deliberation, the jury finds Jada…

Jada, you’ll have the possibility of parole in 2089.

P.S. Tangentially related: