If You Yearn To Discretely Drink Alcohol In Public Then This ‘Cool Baby’ Kickstarter Project Is For You

I’m all for innovation. Love seeing American’s come up with tomorrow’s “iPod” ideas. Ask anyone who has ever crossed my path and they’ll tell you that. They’ll say, verbatim, “He could really give a shit about innovation. Don’t believe a word he says.”

Look, fuck those people. I love innovation, because that’s what I want you to believe right before I shit all over this idiotic Cool Baby Kickstarter that I came across today.

Seriously, there are so many other things you can waste your money on. And I’m all for people wasting their money on things. Ask anyone who has ever…okay, we’ve gone down that path before, we know where it leads.

Point is, buying a fake baby to drink alcohol out of has to be rock bottom. I guess it’s not bad if you don’t mind wasting $30 to be THAT ASSHOLE at one party, one time, because that’s the shelf-life of this thing. You use it once, people give you pity laughs, and then you throw it in a closet until your force yourself to dress up as Alan from The Hangover for the next three Halloweens just to get your money’s worth.

The goal for the Cool Baby Kickstarter is $70,000. Here is a link to donate. Do whatever you feel is necessary.